Toilets over hearts...

I thought about bucking the system and proclaiming to the world I dislike this idea of Valentines Day. But I'm not a liar. So I am going to come out and say; I kind of like it. Psh! Came clean. That's a huge load off! I'm going to have to come clean more often! James you may feel like you don't know me anymore... keep reading.

I only kind of like it. So don't go crazy, and go out and buy me flowers or anything.... unless you feel compelled. And I am sure that if you did feel compelled, you would know to get the lilies. They are the best. But I digress. I don't love this weird pressure that comes with the "holiday". I don't like red everything. Red cheesy hearts. Red balloons in the shape a heart. Red cards full of hearts. Candy hearts. Stuffed animals with, you got it, a heart in its little bear paws... you get it right?! I am not feeling the hearts. Hearts don't spark joy. Can we come up with a little something more heart felt? Pun totally added on purpose... I'm sorry- I couldn't help it anymore then I can help overusing exclamation points or weird dashes-- or dot dot dots... you're going to have to get used to it.

Back to this National Holiday. Men I feel bad for you! You have been told that going to buy these things is apparently good. The world lied to you. I am sorry. When you get home and find your woman is mad at you for buying the red rose, with the red heart chocolate, and the card that had that big ol' red heart on it, after today I will no longer be guilty by omission. I'm going to tell you the truth. Brace your self. Grab a notepad.

What your woman really wants is one of 200 things. I am sure of it. I'm going to write you an exhaustive list of what those things are. Okay. I'm going to write three things it could possibly be. If you do anyone of them you might not be in trouble if you do it before you get home.

Here it goes. She wants you to finish that honey "do" list. I could stop there and the world would be right. I'm going to keep going though because I like you. Counter culture shocker coming up so prepare yourself, again. Don't buy a card. Write your own dang note. Bonus points if it turns into a letter. Triple bonus points if you get callouses on your hands from pouring out your soul so deeply it evokes tears. MEN that is the end game. You win if you can accomplish this. Ready for one more? Scroll through the memory banks of your mind and find a something that you know she loves. Like target. What section does she like there? Buy something from said section. Something pretty. Something not heart shaped for goodness sakes!!!

Now there is only 197 other possibilities. You got this! Like I said I feel for you men... especially when all the women truly have to do is... well. Nothing. We could do nothing and that would just relieve the pressure. Or make it worse. Shoot it's a trap! Can I apologize men on behalf of this crazy sneaky holiday?!

How about this tip for you guys... It may not complete your woman, but it will definitely get you some points... go wrap up your sweetie in the biggest, most genuine, embrace--- then lightly cup her cheek while looking in her eyes and just let her know you like her. That you see her. That you are thankful for her. That you like her nose. Or her wrist. Maybe a freckle on her neck. Something that she wouldn't already know you like, because surprise and more than the obvious is good...

I have had the pleasure of hanging on to this handsome man for 8 years. He still makes me snort laugh. Makes me crazy mad, just keeping it real, like only he can do. Makes me feel safe. Proud. At home. Gosh I like him... and it really melts me when he cleans a toilet over bringing me a heart anything. So go ahead and try. If it fails at least your toilet bowl is clean.

Here are to my couples of 2017. I know you have your own ways of making YOUR relationship work. It is special. Unique. Perfect in the imperfections. You, my friends, are building foundations for your families. Leaving memories. You are FOR each other. A team. You slay Valentines day because you do it on the day to day. You don't need the nations approval. You just need each other.

Leingang I sure NEED you. You make my world full of intensity. There isn't a day that I don't want to adventure with my favorite friend. I like watching our world unfold through the eyes of our children. The girl who's heart you stole didn't have a clue, she couldn't dream up a better future. I like OURS. I'm so thankful for who God gave me in you. I want to take the pressure off. Come on home.I'm going to surprise you with dinner tonight. You can't go wrong with what you do. Or is that a trap... ;) Read above for clues.

~Love Wobyn